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Author's Chapter Notes:
Rated PG-13 for slight reference to sexual acts.

This is my first, short post... Reviews and critics are welcomed =)
テ’Odi et amo. Quare id faciam fortasse requiris.
Nescio sed fieri sentio et excrucior.テ“

テ’I hate and I love. Why do I do this, perhaps you ask?
I do not know, but I feel it happening and I am tormented.テ“

(Catullus 85, G. V. Catullus)

The weak and warm light of the early dawn entered from the window, and illuminated the bedroom. A pale ray of sunlight hit the sleeping manテ不 shoulder, making his white skin golden and translucent. His naked body was lying in the bed, on his side, half hidden by the messy blankets. His upper body was uncovered, so that his back was fully exposed, from his flanks to his shoulders, while his long, black hair was hiding the back of his neck.

テ’Klausテ嘉“ Dorian sighed to himself in a low whisper, not wanting to wake the man near him. He turned on his side, resting his head on his hand, his fingers tangled in his golden curls.
Over and over, since it all had begun, heテ錨 found himself waking up before the break of dawn only to watch his lover asleep. It was such a heavenly sight.

Instinctively he reached out to softly pet the raven hair, and he came closer. He was close enough to see the manテ不 face. He slowly pulled aside a lock of hair. Dorian found Klaus so beautiful when he was asleep: there was a peaceful expression on his face; he looked so innocent and almost fragile. His lips were slightly parted, and Dorian couldnテ付 help but touch them with his fingers. Those lips, which had only curses and arrogance for everybody, including him; those lips, which looked only capable of hate and rage towards him during day.

But when the night came, those lips would whisper soft words of love, and Klaus would kiss him passionately, panting, moaning, screaming his love for him. And Iron Klaus would show himself like the caring and loving person Dorian knew he was. Dorian loved the nights he spent with Klaus, those nights when his uptight and arrogant Major melted into a completely different person, into someone only Dorian knew could exist. And during those nights everything that had happened during day was forgotten. Klaus would surrender to him, would let love and passion overtake him, would tell over and over how much he loved the blond Earl, would be so good to him. And then he would spread his legs and let Dorian fully posses him. He would give in and open his body and soul to his lover; and free himself by the masque of steel he created around him at work, a masque that only Dorian could destroy.
Dorian loved those nights, and loved the hidden part of Klaus with all his heart.

He looked at the man's eyes. They were shut tightly: he was deeply asleep. Dorian loved those eyes, their colour, the sparkle of passion and luxury that shone into them when they made love. He loved those eyes, but right now he just wanted them to stay shut. He knew that when they would open again, the Klaus he had met between the sheets that night would quickly vanish and be replaced by a stranger who looked exactly like him, but whom Dorian couldn't recognize, refused to. He would wear the usual masque of steel again and turn in the cruel, arrogant man he was everyday.

Dorian watched with a sad look as the sun began to rise up in the sky, enveloping the whole bedroom in his light. Soon his lover would wake up, become Iron Klaus again and treat Dorian like a worthless object.
Klaus and Major Eberbach, two different souls in the same body.
And Dorian knew both of them, and just couldn't stop the pain he felt inside for this.
He loved so much how gentle, almost fragile, Klaus was when they made love, but could almost hate Major Eberbach, cold-hearted, unbreakable and untouchable, a sadist who insulted his lover only for the pleasure of doing this, or maybe, most probably, to save face with his co-workers.
The sound of the alarm clock ripped through the peaceful atmosphere, echoing in the room like a curse. Klaus' eyes snapped open and he got up, pulling the blankets aside. Dorian buried his face in the pillow, pretending to be still asleep. Klaus walked to the bathroom, showered, got dressed then came back to the bedroom. He sat on the edge of the bed and spoke softly into Dorianテ不 ear to wake him. Dorian turned around and smiled, whispering good morning.

"...My love" he said in an almost inaudible purr. Klaus smiled back, giving him a quick kiss on the lips, a kiss that, to Dorian, already had a bitter taste of emptiness. Then he got up and walked out of the room, leaving Dorian surrounded by doubts and absence.

Dorian hugged the sheets to his chest, inhaling his lover's scent. Tears flooded his eyes. He wasn't sure if he could take this love-hate relationship anymore. He didn't know if and how all that was happening, either. He only knew it happened, and he was tormented.



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